We have all experienced that optimism of starting over with a new mode of trying to find a new partner.  Trying a new app is the most common thing these days since too many of us work too much and don’t have time to meet new people the old fashioned way. So what do we all do?  Download the new app, create yet another  username, another profile, and another veil of hope that THIS TIME we will meet someone!

After swiping our thumbs raw we notice familiar faces start creeping up.  The app may even recommend previous people you have matched with on other apps and this time the current app is saying how great of a pair you two would be yet when you tried to make contact with that person before nothing happened.  Either literally, they ignored you, or nothing ever got off the ground after you went on a date (or a few dates).  You wonder how a computer algorithm can see a connection between two humans but said humans can’t translate that out in the real world?  It’s a bit sad actually.  We are losing what makes us uniquely human and growing lonelier through each download into our phones.

I do think all these dating apps are the same.  Whether you are paying a monthly (or yearly) subscription, it’s free, religious, fetish – whatever.  Same people, same swiping or matching, same old story that leads nowhere.  These apps can not replace true human interaction or replace having that special someone to cuddle with or vent about your day.

There is something to be said about “unplugging” yourself from time to time.  If you feel like what you are attracting isn’t worthy of who you are, delete your profile and the app, and take a break.  Believe me, you won’t miss out on meeting that great partner.  It will save you a lot of bad first dates and wasted time that could be spent with people who deserve your time and affection .  Sometimes we get so wrapped up in, I HAVE to find someone! that we lose sight that our Friday nights or free time are better spent with family and friends.

That kind of intimacy is impossible to replace and should be cherished.

Do yourself a favor if you are feeling overloaded by apps, or just dating in general and unplug yourself for a while.  Instead of searching out for Summer Love, try and fall in love with yourself.  You may just like it.