If you haven’t heard, seen or watched the clip of Louis CK’s show, “Louie,” where the fat woman voices her struggles with dating in great detail, you are missing an important conversation that is almost muted in our society. The female character goes on about how her struggles encompass men almost living in fear of walking hand in hand with her, let alone dating her, because they are worried to be seen with her. Louie’s character gives off the usual physical and verbal reactions; looking around nervously, and spitting out the knee jerk reaction of, “No, you aren’t fat” as a way to make the woman feel better about herself and almost convince himself that it is indeed okay and acceptable TO date her. I don’t necessarily agree with all of what the female character is saying, but I think it’s important to start there.
Yes, everyone has a preference. That’s just human nature. The problem lies in there being preferences versus denying happiness due to how you are perceived by your peers. I believe it goes deeper than how heavy a person is too. I know that to some, they may be into say, black women, but would never openly date them or marry them out of fear of what their friends or family may say or do. In some cases they may even be disowned. Or they may be bullied for dating someone out of their class – the list is endless. I do think things are getting marginally better, but it’s not enough. If you meet someone, you click, and there is mutual attraction, why not pursue things? Why not see where things go? Why are we so worried about what someone else thinks or what someone else sees? People spend a lot of time, energy, and money to impress other people. There are industries built on taking your money to make you appear better for a limited time. What happens when it’s over? What happens when you aren’t important anymore? You are left alone. The party is over, the money may be gone, and your bed is cold again. What if we made the start to begin working to make ourselves happy? Would we be better for it in the long run? Of course!
We all need to start having this conversation honestly, and let go of the fear of being judged by our peers. They may have the same desires but are too scared to admit it as well. I’m glad this video is going viral. Hopefully, there is more honesty in the media, and in our lives. We are all looking for the same thing – that connection. It shouldn’t be hampered by any prejudice or fear.
Spread love & inspire happiness for all!
The video is a little over 7 minutes, but it is definitely worth watching the entire thing. How does it impact you? Is this opening dialogue within your circle of friends? Maybe your family? Let me know!